Sharon Brindle is preparing to die.

A
B, Ashe (1984-05-29)
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Backman, Mikaela (1983-02-12)
Baggage, Cam-the- (1975-06-06)
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BEALES, JEFF (1966-08-25)
Beardslee, Sharon (1954-10-15)
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Bittu, Roy (1990-03-09)
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Blackwell, Chris (1977-06-20)
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Boice, Jonathan (1974-10-09)
Borgstrom, Carl (1958-06-24)
Boswell, Ann (1971-09-03)
Bounds, Jon (1975-06-30)
Bower, Paul (1982-06-08)
Boylan, Jenny (1973-10-06)
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Boyle, William (1983-07-13)
Brace, Adam (1980-03-25)
Bradley, David (1959-10-31)
Bramble, Mary Jo (1962-03-01)
Brammer, Sal (1990-04-29)
Brand, Chloe (1980-04-15)
Braun, Tobi (1977-08-29)
Brenda, Cruz (1993-04-23)
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Bridger, Tyson (1969-01-06)
Bridget Conboy, Marie (1985-06-12)
Briggs, Michael (1990-04-05)
Brigham, Daniel (1980-04-25)
Brightwell, Johanna (1964-05-20)
Bril, Eran (1976-02-03)
Brindle, Sharon (1971-11-09)
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Brookman, Jacob (1984-09-07)
Brosnand, Peirce (1909-05-08)
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Brown, Molly (0000-00-00)
Brown, Phillip (1977-11-09)
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Burr, William (1973-11-17)
Burton, Mark (1965-11-28)
Butler, Dave (1975-03-10)
Byrne, David (2009-06-29)
Byrne, Deirdre (1983-03-22)
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DISPOSAL


COFFIN
Just burn me, but first I want to have some fun. I want a "twanging" ceremony before the service (a la Eddie Izzard), where my body is placed on a giant catapult. The mourners can all help to pull me down as far as possible, then I want to be twung into the highest nearby tree. Should be a laugh trying to get me down again!

RELIGION
I don't have a religion (agnostic going on aetheist).

GUESTS
I want all the bitchy sopranos banned, and every director that didn't cast me! Of course, all my family and friends have to come, and I want all my ex-boyfriends invited and stuck right at the front so that everyone can see them try to show emotion (ha bloody ha!)

MUSIC
I want to start with the "Sanctus" from the Durufle Requiem, and the "When I am laid in Earth" from Dido and Aeneas just to set up the atmos. During the service I want one of my tenor friends to sing Gilbert & Sullivan's "Is life a boon", and then when my coffin goes in to be burnt it has to be Ella Fitzgerald's "Every time we say goodbye". By this time the congregation will be emotional wrecks (I hope!), so then I'll hit them with Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's "Goodbye" to shock them out of it.

READINGS
I'd like some of my rude parodies sung by my friends - it gives a flavour of what I'm about and hopefully raise a laugh.

EPITAPH


OBITUARY


OTHER