Marie Bridget Conboy is preparing to die.

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I now understand that my lack of thought in writing about this morbid topic has caused undue worry, in ever widening circles, and I am deeply sorry for the undue hassle it has caused. I suppose now that some of my thoughts are no longer a secrete. I really and trully should explain myself. I want to explain first of all what was trully meant by it. For those of you who [to my real suprise] know me in person. I can see how unless you knew me very, very well indeed [this rather stupid idea of mine to write about my funeral] could have been percieved as being a heartfelt suicide note. It was and has always been a work of pure and utter fiction. First of all it was written a year ago. [how much one's perceptions change in a year? Even now when I look back on what I had written I am shocked] I was not and thankfull I am not in any way a depressed individual. More importantly I think its important that I now make crystal clear my authentic views on suicide. Even if I were deeply depressed [thankfull this rarely so. Which suppose could be somewhat evident by my on going natural compulsion to smile. Yet that rarely reveals the true nature of things within.] Suicide has never and will never be something I would ever think of. Firstly it would absolutely tare my families heart's apart and I would never concieve even the thought of doing so. Secondly it is totally contary to the religion I profess. Thirdly and probably more fitting is the honest truth that I love life :) and I would never wish to cut it short at all. In my own personal viewpoint every day holds the promise of more new experiences. And in these experience more things to learn from. When it is over. It is over by the will of God and it should never lie in your hands the power to decide when you yourself think it fitting to die. Well then what was your point in writing on this topic? I do of course see how it could appear to others that I was trully going to commit suicide because this was so specific, deep and close to the bone. I actually did not realise that its headline would be "Marie Conboy is preparing to die.." When I did write it I had read about the popularity of this website and I decided to make my own Fictional contribution [however convincing it happened to be] But once it was written I never even considered the next day what I had actually said in it. I as a person write many things and sometimes I do not even think about its contents the following day. Like everything that is written: It is an impulse for that time and the impulse passes just as quickly as it comes. In this way so too what I had written here was long absent from my mind untill of course the events of this week resulted in the consequence that I had to totally refresh my meind on what on earth I had actually written here! And the shock! In one sense yes trully I could not believe what I had written yet in another sense I could. Now I do remember very vidly that when I was writing here I was thinking about what does happen to some young people. Sometimes unfortunately some people do die young due to tragic circumstances (car crashes for example) and if (God forbid) that would ever happen to me I was writing about what I would say to my loved ones if I could. Also I was thinking about how I would want my funeral to be; full of greatfulness and thanks for what I considere my life to be; very content because of how good those people I have in my life are to me. But why were you writing about your funeral in such detail? You have to admit it is a very morbid topic? Firstly it is a popular website (but indeed much more popular then I imagined!) Yes I am well aware that my fault lies in that I write about almost anything under the sun, including the rather morbid aspects of life. Very important is the fact that never in a million years did I think someone I would know would read it. That was the point of why I wrote it. To express feelings I would never tell to anyone else. Anything that I write no one I know is ever meant to read them. There are a million websites on the internet how this site was found and this page by somone I know I have no idea. But it is a small world and how aware of that I am now. I am sorry for the undue worry it has caused but I hope you now know that trully it was only a peice of un thought out fiction. Also I do want to say that a lot of the thoughts that I expressed here no longer apply. They were inpulses of the time, that also by time, no longer hold to be true. (Jacinta for example would be no longer barred from a funeral. I sincerely apologize for my angry impulse. Truly for months now that sentiment has no longer applied. This rash and hasty statement- not meant to be read by other's knowing eyes- has been ommited) I now will delete all of the contents here. It now no longer holds to be true (as do so many things) and I am very sorry again that it has caused such undue alarm. Life is good and there is no need to worry :) ...............





"A seed fell, the winter passed, and day by day it grew. One day it realised it had grown into a little flower. The rain and wind came and battered against its tender flesh yet it survived. In the end it was its very own roots that chocked it. No, It never became the flower it was destined to be but at least it was one" I would like to affirm that this article was a work of pure fiction. :) :)

nope dont want my loved ones under pressure