Qtym Best-Hall is preparing to die.

A
B, Ashe (1984-05-29)
Back, Gabi (1989-10-18)
Backman, Mikaela (1983-02-12)
Baggage, Cam-the- (1975-06-06)
Bags, Penny (1987-10-22)
Bailey, Stacey (1979-08-30)
Bain, AL (1974-01-01)
Baker, Chris (1980-05-02)
Bale, Ben (1984-01-22)
Bale, Ben (1984-01-22)
Bale, Ben (1984-01-22)
Bale, Danny (1989-10-31)
Bale, Gemma (1989-09-27)
Ball, Nigel (1968-07-03)
Baloch, Waheed (1995-07-01)
Banks, Patrick (1983-09-01)
Banner, Wynfred (1981-01-02)
Barbarash, Andrew (1982-08-19)
Barham, D. A. (1976-11-20)
Barigela, Swamy (1936-08-15)
Barker, Andrew (1974-08-20)
Barker, Bob (1976-07-24)
Barreca, James (1979-02-07)
Bartley, Ken (1965-07-10)
Barton, Austin (1976-08-01)
Bates, Megan (1992-07-16)
Baumann, Petra (1971-11-28)
Baylis, Sarah (1972-02-03)
Beacom, John (1964-03-17)
BEALES, JEFF (1966-08-25)
Beardslee, Sharon (1954-10-15)
Becerra, Gabriela (1995-03-24)
Beckinsale, Tim (1977-10-13)
Bedford, Lydia (1994-01-20)
Beer, Stevie (1969-04-14)
Belkacem, Ben (1974-05-13)
Bell, Brent (1984-01-31)
Bell, Jennifer (1980-05-03)
Belsher, A (1969-08-01)
Beltran, Raygoza (1962-08-24)
Bendeck, Anny (1988-05-01)
Bendle, Bendle Calder (1960-06-03)
Bennett, Ian (1973-04-23)
Bennett, Jules (1969-12-23)
Bently, Simon (1979-05-09)
Benz, Mitchell (1990-12-03)
Berry, Sea (1986-07-20)
Best-Hall, Qtym (1985-11-19)
Betts, Robb (1980-01-11)
Bharti, Deven (1980-09-25)
Bianchini, Fabio (1974-11-04)
Bin, Astrid (1979-05-14)
Bird, Craig (1971-03-21)
Bitch, Techno (1978-02-03)
Bittu, Roy (1990-03-09)
Björnsson, Finnur (1971-07-27)
Bkr, Nat (1986-03-06)
Black, Chris (1974-04-10)
Blackwell, Chris (1977-06-20)
Blake, Trav (1990-07-14)
Bland, Kathy (1972-03-15)
Blanton, Bo (1981-11-11)
Blatter, Andrea (1978-11-05)
Blossoms, Buttercup (1989-11-10)
Blumenkraft, Leopold (1970-12-25)
Blumensheid, Alan (1954-07-31)
Boag, James (1968-11-26)
Boice, Jonathan (1974-10-09)
Borgstrom, Carl (1958-06-24)
Boswell, Ann (1971-09-03)
Bounds, Jon (1975-06-30)
Bower, Paul (1982-06-08)
Boylan, Jenny (1973-10-06)
Boyle, William (1983-07-13)
Boyle, William (1983-07-13)
Brace, Adam (1980-03-25)
Bradley, David (1959-10-31)
Bramble, Mary Jo (1962-03-01)
Brammer, Sal (1990-04-29)
Brand, Chloe (1980-04-15)
Braun, Tobi (1977-08-29)
Brenda, Cruz (1993-04-23)
Brewin, Kester (1972-08-21)
Bridger, Tyson (1969-01-06)
Bridget Conboy, Marie (1985-06-12)
Briggs, Michael (1990-04-05)
Brigham, Daniel (1980-04-25)
Brightwell, Johanna (1964-05-20)
Bril, Eran (1976-02-03)
Brindle, Sharon (1971-11-09)
Broadley, Beki (1985-11-23)
Brookman, Jacob (1984-09-07)
Brosnand, Peirce (1909-05-08)
Brown, Hugh (1970-12-26)
Brown, Louis (1980-06-03)
Brown, Molly (0000-00-00)
Brown, Phillip (1977-11-09)
Bruce, Morag (1979-04-24)
Bryant, David (1973-09-14)
Buchanan, Stuart (1970-07-22)
Buckett, Mark (1976-02-14)
Buckley, Gray (1989-11-14)
Budden, Rhiannon (1992-04-02)
Bullock, Lindsay (1966-06-03)
Bunn, Alex (1975-08-17)
Burke, Alice (1983-07-27)
Burns, Billy (1970-08-28)
Burr, William (1973-11-17)
Burton, Mark (1965-11-28)
Butler, Dave (1975-03-10)
Byrne, David (2009-06-29)
Byrne, Deirdre (1983-03-22)
C
D
E
F
G
H
I
J
K
L
M
N
O
P
Q
R
S
T
U
V
W
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Z

DISPOSAL
Dump me, unmodified, off of the side of a boat, into the ocean. Seriously. After some research, it has been determined that this is best.

COFFIN
The clear blue sea. (Sea may be green.)

RELIGION
No thank you.

GUESTS
Becky Chawner. Greg Mahlum. Alfredo Guevara. The Dingo. Norman Nguyen. Shawn Bartok. Jay (Whitney) Read. Richie (Pfil) Bonventre. Peter (Melvin) Falco. Matt Smith (in some sort of costume.) Jon (Owen) Hill. Not Elliot (Skit) Imler. Rachel Stitt (must cry.) Sara Melton (must sing.) Katie Arntzen (must dance.) Brother, Mother, Father, Aunts and Uncles, Cousins, Cousins' Children, Grandparents where applicable. Pets (mandatory.) The person who brought about my demise, where applicable. Coworkers. Select several random celebrities.

MUSIC
To be performed by a live band

READINGS


EPITAPH


OBITUARY


OTHER