Ben Bale is preparing to die.

A
B, Ashe (1984-05-29)
Back, Gabi (1989-10-18)
Backman, Mikaela (1983-02-12)
Baggage, Cam-the- (1975-06-06)
Bags, Penny (1987-10-22)
Bailey, Stacey (1979-08-30)
Bain, AL (1974-01-01)
Baker, Chris (1980-05-02)
Bale, Ben (1984-01-22)
Bale, Ben (1984-01-22)
Bale, Ben (1984-01-22)
Bale, Danny (1989-10-31)
Bale, Gemma (1989-09-27)
Ball, Nigel (1968-07-03)
Baloch, Waheed (1995-07-01)
Banks, Patrick (1983-09-01)
Banner, Wynfred (1981-01-02)
Barbarash, Andrew (1982-08-19)
Barham, D. A. (1976-11-20)
Barigela, Swamy (1936-08-15)
Barker, Andrew (1974-08-20)
Barker, Bob (1976-07-24)
Barreca, James (1979-02-07)
Bartley, Ken (1965-07-10)
Barton, Austin (1976-08-01)
Bates, Megan (1992-07-16)
Baumann, Petra (1971-11-28)
Baylis, Sarah (1972-02-03)
Beacom, John (1964-03-17)
BEALES, JEFF (1966-08-25)
Beardslee, Sharon (1954-10-15)
Becerra, Gabriela (1995-03-24)
Beckinsale, Tim (1977-10-13)
Bedford, Lydia (1994-01-20)
Beer, Stevie (1969-04-14)
Belkacem, Ben (1974-05-13)
Bell, Brent (1984-01-31)
Bell, Jennifer (1980-05-03)
Belsher, A (1969-08-01)
Beltran, Raygoza (1962-08-24)
Bendeck, Anny (1988-05-01)
Bendle, Bendle Calder (1960-06-03)
Bennett, Ian (1973-04-23)
Bennett, Jules (1969-12-23)
Bently, Simon (1979-05-09)
Benz, Mitchell (1990-12-03)
Berry, Sea (1986-07-20)
Best-Hall, Qtym (1985-11-19)
Betts, Robb (1980-01-11)
Bharti, Deven (1980-09-25)
Bianchini, Fabio (1974-11-04)
Bin, Astrid (1979-05-14)
Bird, Craig (1971-03-21)
Bitch, Techno (1978-02-03)
Bittu, Roy (1990-03-09)
Björnsson, Finnur (1971-07-27)
Bkr, Nat (1986-03-06)
Black, Chris (1974-04-10)
Blackwell, Chris (1977-06-20)
Blake, Trav (1990-07-14)
Bland, Kathy (1972-03-15)
Blanton, Bo (1981-11-11)
Blatter, Andrea (1978-11-05)
Blossoms, Buttercup (1989-11-10)
Blumenkraft, Leopold (1970-12-25)
Blumensheid, Alan (1954-07-31)
Boag, James (1968-11-26)
Boice, Jonathan (1974-10-09)
Borgstrom, Carl (1958-06-24)
Boswell, Ann (1971-09-03)
Bounds, Jon (1975-06-30)
Bower, Paul (1982-06-08)
Boylan, Jenny (1973-10-06)
Boyle, William (1983-07-13)
Boyle, William (1983-07-13)
Brace, Adam (1980-03-25)
Bradley, David (1959-10-31)
Bramble, Mary Jo (1962-03-01)
Brammer, Sal (1990-04-29)
Brand, Chloe (1980-04-15)
Braun, Tobi (1977-08-29)
Brenda, Cruz (1993-04-23)
Brewin, Kester (1972-08-21)
Bridger, Tyson (1969-01-06)
Bridget Conboy, Marie (1985-06-12)
Briggs, Michael (1990-04-05)
Brigham, Daniel (1980-04-25)
Brightwell, Johanna (1964-05-20)
Bril, Eran (1976-02-03)
Brindle, Sharon (1971-11-09)
Broadley, Beki (1985-11-23)
Brookman, Jacob (1984-09-07)
Brosnand, Peirce (1909-05-08)
Brown, Hugh (1970-12-26)
Brown, Louis (1980-06-03)
Brown, Molly (0000-00-00)
Brown, Phillip (1977-11-09)
Bruce, Morag (1979-04-24)
Bryant, David (1973-09-14)
Buchanan, Stuart (1970-07-22)
Buckett, Mark (1976-02-14)
Buckley, Gray (1989-11-14)
Budden, Rhiannon (1992-04-02)
Bullock, Lindsay (1966-06-03)
Bunn, Alex (1975-08-17)
Burke, Alice (1983-07-27)
Burns, Billy (1970-08-28)
Burr, William (1973-11-17)
Burton, Mark (1965-11-28)
Butler, Dave (1975-03-10)
Byrne, David (2009-06-29)
Byrne, Deirdre (1983-03-22)
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DISPOSAL
I don't give a damn where I go, I wont be there to flippin' see it will I? Give to science any parts of my body they want, and then dispose of the rest in a M&S plastic bag over a bridge onto a passing convertable. Or, better yet, give me to the local school as "Grade F Meat" for school dinners...

COFFIN
Preferably a big fridge with a TV screen at the head so that I can be seen telling "Why did the chicken cross the road" jokes on a continous loop for all eternity

RELIGION
When you all get together to remember me, don't speak of me 'being in a better place' or 'away from the horrors of the world' becuase if any earthly religion is right, then I went down not up. So have a funreal where you remember the good bits of me, the bad bits and the bits that nobody cared either way about. Think back on my life and not to the future, for if there is one, then for me it will not be happy.

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