Nick G is preparing to die.

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D
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G, G (1955-09-01)
G, Nick (1990-09-26)
G., Rekky (1990-04-14)
Gacia, PAULA (1973-08-02)
Gage, Nick (1974-08-12)
Gage, Nick (1974-08-12)
Gahdoffkoehrn, Katie (1986-03-09)
GALL, JEFFREY (1941-06-19)
Gallegos, Gabby (1970-06-20)
Gamble, Carl (1976-03-03)
Garcia, Paula (1973-08-02)
Garcia, Rick (1982-07-05)
Garden, John (1975-06-09)
Garden, Rose (1986-03-10)
Gardiner, Ian (1979-10-20)
Gardner, Aneirin (1987-10-26)
Garika, G (1986-04-20)
Gassmann, Alexander (1988-02-26)
Genzler, Martin (1976-02-04)
George, Gavin (1989-04-03)
George, Sashell (1983-05-13)
George, Zeaus (1978-06-20)
Gervaise Brazier, Jim (1976-06-05)
Gibson, Sophie (1990-12-21)
Gil, Diana (1991-01-04)
Gilbert, Jon (1972-03-08)
Gill, Reggie (1978-12-25)
Gill-Harrison, Kelvin (1977-05-30)
Gillespie, Bobby (1962-06-22)
Gilliam, Stephanie (1986-05-10)
Gillies, Rod (1970-05-23)
Gilmour, Christopher (1978-12-12)
Gimpo, Gimpo (1962-04-26)
Glenn, Jennifer (1986-05-10)
Gnihton Eht, The Nothing (1983-03-02)
Goede, Kathryn (1972-05-26)
Goldman, Eyal (1977-07-02)
Goldstein, Yuval (1978-05-07)
Gommon, Ed (1978-10-19)
Gonzales, Sofia (1978-05-30)
Goodman, Ross (2006-04-23)
Goodway, Beth (1990-07-23)
Gordon, Mart (1975-08-06)
Gorton, Nicholas (1971-10-27)
Gow, Alan (1973-12-11)
Gow, Charlotte (1979-04-05)
Goyal, Gourav (1992-02-24)
Goyal, Sandeep (1979-10-30)
Gradwell, Patrick (1974-01-16)
Graham, Phillip (1968-10-24)
Grange, Holly (1985-08-15)
Grant, Alyssa (1990-11-11)
Grant, Chris (1972-08-23)
Grant, Hijinio (1988-12-05)
Grant, Scott (1973-06-16)
Graves-johnston, Andrew Richard (1960-02-29)
Gray, Chris (1972-03-10)
Gray, Jackie (1986-02-27)
Gray, Patrick (1972-09-16)
Grears, Chris (1981-11-10)
Green, Dave (1973-06-04)
GREEN, DAVID (1973-06-04)
Green, Joshua (1980-05-26)
Green, Steve (1975-10-29)
Griffin, Carol (1983-11-07)
Guativa, Mauricio (1992-01-24)
Guest, John (1971-12-23)
Gul, Gulraiz (1985-10-24)
Gunning, Erin (1957-10-07)
Gura, Jemma (1972-09-09)
Guthrie, Blake (2007-05-07)
Guy, Ian (1963-10-29)
Gwyer, Matt (1989-12-03)
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DISPOSAL
Cremation. Build a huge bonfire on the beach at twilight. Take the coffin and put it on top of the bonfire, then when the sevice is over light it. Keep burning until there's nothing left. If by the end there are still some ashes or whatever, collect them and scatter them in the ocean. The specific beach is in Aireys Inlet, near where my parents' beach house is. Have me transported there by the most convenient way possible: if I die in Melbourne or anywhere in Victoria have the hearse drive my body there, but if I die interstate or overseas then fly me back to Melbourne and THEN drive me there. But it has to be that beach.

COFFIN
Ordinary shape. Black wood, like ebony, and electric blue lining inside. Everything has to be inflammable (see Disposal). Make it an open coffin. I don't care if little kids see. Just make sure the undertaker does all he can to make me look OK if I die of something gross.

RELIGION
No religion. I have my own beliefs, not that of any organised institution. Keep my funeral irreligious

GUESTS
Immediate family, all the extended family I see regularly, and closest friends. I don't want vague distant relations who pretend to be unhappy, or vague people I know who pretend to have known me well.

MUSIC
"Who Wants to Live Forever?" by Queen. I like that song.

READINGS
No artsy-fartsy readings at my funeral. Just the basic "We are gathered here today..." thing. The bonfire bit is the important part.

EPITAPH
No epitaph: I've just been cremated and scattered.

OBITUARY


OTHER
I'll go with the humanist guys to conduct the service. But I'll have some of my family as pallbearers: preferably the young ones so they don't get out of attending.