Vanessa Jones is preparing to die.

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J, Markus (1985-06-03)
J, Sarah (1985-02-21)
Jackson, Laura (1987-02-05)
Jackson, Paul (1974-03-05)
Jackson, Stephen (1970-02-08)
Jalex, Rikard (1990-01-31)
James, Jason (1974-01-23)
James, Peter (1957-02-01)
Jani, Glm (1948-09-17)
Jarvis, Michael (1986-10-10)
Jarvis, Ross (1975-11-30)
Jaskowiak, R (1971-01-01)
Jay, Jess (1985-06-03)
Jaye, Tania (1979-09-20)
Jeffries, Roy (1941-02-18)
Jenkins, Aubrey (1975-05-11)
Jenkins, Susana (1979-07-06)
Jenkinson, Andrew (1972-03-22)
Jennifer, Javier (1982-11-27)
Jennings, David (1965-07-11)
Jent, Matthew (1979-03-13)
Jessup, Edd (1990-06-28)
Jielka, Bulien (1967-02-20)
Jiji, Julia (1990-02-09)
John, Bob (1975-07-24)
John, Daisy (1985-05-02)
Johnson, Adeline (1991-09-19)
Johnson, Daniel (1970-09-29)
Johnson, Iain (1979-11-11)
Johnston, Andrew (1960-02-29)
Johnston, John (1988-08-08)
Jones, Andrew (1974-05-22)
Jones, Casey (1984-11-02)
Jones, Claire (1989-10-27)
Jones, Eli (1975-11-05)
Jones, Lydia (1974-02-03)
Jones, Ruth (1960-12-18)
Jones, Vanessa (1973-01-11)
Jones, Zara (1979-11-03)
Jones III, Quequegg (1792-06-17)
Jourdain, Henry (1972-11-30)
Jowers, SHARON (1980-01-31)
Joy, Nena (1945-11-08)
Jugon, Dean (1986-05-08)
Julian, Christopher (1969-04-30)
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DISPOSAL
The cementry in Barons Court would be nice as that's where I used to bunk off lessons at college, or the really old cementry on Kew Green if you can fit me in somewhere. Or alternaivly, throw me in a shark tank, at the London Aquarium, then you can make a bit of money for the wake by selling tickets. However, this would balls up my gravestone plan.

COFFIN
Right - my coffin will have to be specially designed to fit in with my gravestone plan. So, it will either have to be a massive upright coffin that doubles up as a gravestone with a glass window where my head is, or else a camera will have instaled in the coffin that will take a weekly photo documenting my decomposition, and the photo will have be displayed (and changed each week) in special slot in the gravestone. I don't know how your gonna work out the logistics of this though - but hopefully technology will have advanced enough for this to be done by the time I cark it.

RELIGION
no thanks

GUESTS


MUSIC
this is one i'll have to come back too, it needs thought and consideration

READINGS
Ivor Cutler

EPITAPH
As you can see from my photo, I'm feeling a bit peaky, but I think I've still kept my looks, at least you can see what great bone structure I had now.

OBITUARY
Is that is??? oh bollocks.

OTHER
Neil Aldis (and you'd better bloody do it)