Valerie Voigt is preparing to die.

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Vadadoriya, Batukbhai (1990-08-14)
Vag, Yaron (1979-04-20)
Vaid, Kant (1975-11-12)
VAJPAYEE, ABEER (1983-12-26)
Valentine, Nigel (1971-03-23)
Valo, Clare (1990-01-20)
Van Der Hoosen, Ruddiger (1976-12-07)
Van Der Put, Cees (1977-09-30)
Vardanian, Gor (1978-02-27)
Vasquez, Michael (1993-08-28)
Vaughan, Megan (1984-02-01)
Veil, Calpurnie Moreen Proodence (1988-04-18)
Velasco, Elizabeth (1990-02-01)
Verkade, Alex (1976-09-30)
Vicious, Shelest (0000-00-00)
Vincent, Jade (1990-06-29)
Vincent, Rob (1977-11-12)
Voigt, Valerie (1953-10-10)
Von Sexmachine, Billiam (1988-01-07)
Voskoboinikov, Michelle (0000-00-00)
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DISPOSAL
If I haven't a good chance of a good life, do not revive; salvage all usable parts for organ donation; donate the rest to medical science.

COFFIN
None, preferably. Or whatever the medical schools do with bodies after they're finished with'em. If, for some reason, any of it gets returned to my relatives, the remains should be cremated and the ashes scattered near Coyote Rock, Wildwood, Lake Martin, Alabama. My sister knows the spot, as do my cousins.

RELIGION
I am a Traditionalist Witch. My friends Ivan, JoAnn, and Zephyr can convene my initiates, my present and former covenmates, and my Feri and Gard tribes. The elders will be able to handle the ceremony. If I can be sung across on my deathbed, all the better. Unless I ask for something else at the time, let's go for sung calls to the Feri Deities, followed by "We All Come from the Goddess," sung as a harmonic round.

GUESTS
Optional: If my family wishes to have a small private ceremony, that's fine with me; my daughters should have veto power on guests. There's nobody I can think of to exclude except that grouch who lives in the apartment next to the laundry room. But if my born-again Christian relatives attend, they must first promise not to try any proselytizing, on pain of being booted out! There should also be a larger community memorial service, held as cheaply as possible. I like the idea of a fairly short ceremony followed by a riotous party: "Plant an acorn, and pass the whiskey!" Though in my case the grog should include Bailey's Irish Cream.

MUSIC
During the serious part of the ceremony, probably some quiet Kitaro as background, ending with Jan and Dean's rendition of "The Little Old Lady from Pasadena." For the party part, a bardic circle, or other performances by friends, and/or other music to be determined by family (maybe I'll think of some specifics to list here).

READINGS
"The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost; preferably read by a family member or one of my initiates.

EPITAPH
If all goes well, there shouldn't be occasion for any headstone. But if there is one, my correct name (Valerie Evelyn Voigt, and there is no "h" anywhere in any part of the name), birth and death dates, and whatever my family wishes to say, if anything--as long as there is NO reference to ANYTHING Christian. If there is a symbol anywhere, let it be a pentagram--but NO cross!

OBITUARY
No clue here. Stay tuned, I guess.

OTHER
Stay tuned...